NGAWire® 2010 | NGAWire® 2009 | NGAWire® 2008
| NGAWire®
2007 | NGAWire® 2006
Tiger
Is An Asshat
NGAWire® 10Dec09
Although Tiger Woods will always be the
greatest golfer ever, his actions are proving him to be a jackass.
Tiger’s fame and fortune allow him to
be a full time debauchee, but his marriage does not.
Elin Woods needs to rid herself of her
ass munch husband sooner than later.
CJI
And Guldahl Cup Scheduled For 2010
NGAWire® 2Nov09
The NGA is pleased to announce that
both the CJI and Guldahl Cup tournaments are planned for 2010. This will be the first time both events will
take place in the same year.
The CJI is scheduled for February 24-28
in
The Guldahl Cup will attract a larger
number of players (due to cost and travel considerations), but both events will
have first class fields.
Boondoggling
In Vegas
LGAWire® 22Oct09
Dateline –
While attending the annual NACS
(National Association of Convenience Stores) convention, Lemmon was sucked into
a picture taking opportunity with Monster ladies and “WeeMan”. Little did I know that this wee-man actually
had prominent roles in the Jackass series and was a fan favorite.
"I just thought he was a
contrasting figure to the Monster ladies,” Lemmon lamented. "If I knew he was a celebrity I would
have got an autograph. Think about how much that would be worth in the future.
I wasn't thinking."
Two hours later a nice patron of the
Swedish Match booth pointed out that I had a "Monster Energy Drink"
sticker on my back. Damn those devious
Monster ladies and their tricks. Don't
trust them.
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Funny
Story
NGAWire® 9Oct09
Earlier this year Dan and Andy were
talking about being co-champions at the
NGAWire® 9Oct09
Today the NGA has announced a change to
the criteria needed for an invitation to the fabled
In the past, all
One unnamed two-time winner from
Another past champion stated “It is
easy to fluke into one victory, but winning three times is a damn great
accomplishment.”
In order to keep this tradition active,
the NGA has modified the name of the dinner to Multiple
This change is effective beginning with
the 2010
Kurncz
Wins
NGAWire® 29Sep09
This past weekend, long time NGA member Andy Kurncz finally realized his
dream. He was crowned champion of the
2009
This was Kurncz’s 15th time participating in the
While his golf play was limited this year, Kurncz vowed to work on a
single swing thought, take one shot at time and be mentally prepared to play
golf.
Looks like it worked.
Nice job Kurnczie!
|
Year |
Hpc |
1st |
2nd |
3rd |
4th |
5th |
6th |
Total |
Finish |
|
1995 |
10 |
80 |
75 |
67 |
|
|
|
222 |
2 |
|
1996 |
13 |
74 |
79 |
88 |
|
|
|
241 |
8 |
|
1997 |
10 |
76 |
78 |
75 |
79 |
|
|
308 |
4 |
|
1998 |
11 |
67 |
73 |
90 |
|
|
|
230 |
5 |
|
1999 |
6 |
81 |
78 |
69 |
|
|
|
228 |
4 |
|
2000 |
9 |
82 |
88 |
83 |
|
|
|
253 |
10 |
|
2001 |
10 |
72 |
75 |
77 |
77 |
|
|
301 |
5 |
|
2002 |
9 |
79 |
77 |
85 |
81 |
75 |
75 |
472 |
5 |
|
2003 |
9 |
82 |
71 |
77 |
90 |
|
|
320 |
4 |
|
2004 |
9 |
78 |
79 |
71 |
75 |
86 |
|
389 |
8 |
|
2005 |
10 |
74 |
76 |
77 |
83 |
74 |
89 |
473 |
7 |
|
2006 |
10 |
80 |
78 |
76 |
77 |
|
|
311 |
3 |
|
2007 |
11 |
80 |
88 |
80 |
72 |
|
|
320 |
6 |
|
2008 |
11 |
76 |
79 |
87 |
91 |
|
|
333 |
5 |
|
2009 |
12 |
74 |
63 |
74 |
75 |
73 |
|
359 |
1 |
2009
NGAWire® 22Sep09
The NGA is pleased to release the 1st round pairings for the
2009
2009
NGAWire® 22Sep09
Just for Jeff Longeway, below is a
snippet of information regarding our mystery accommodations.
This 4
bedroom cottage will accommodate up to 13-people with 2 bedrooms downstairs and
2 bedrooms upstairs. The first levels bedrooms have 1 with a double bed and 1
with 2 sets of bunk beds. Also on the first floor is the kitchen area, bathroom
with shower. The kitchen has a full size stove, refrigerator, microwave, coffee
maker, toaster, pots, pans, dishes, silverware. The second floor has 2
additional bedrooms. The 1st has a double bed and the other on the 2nd floor
has 1 twin and 1 bunk bed. There is also a bathroom on the 2nd floor with a
shower. This cottage is equipped with central air, heat, gas fireplace, AM/FM
clock radio, telephone. Linens are supplied for the bedrooms, bathrooms and
kitchen. A maximum of up to 2 extra beds - either 2 rollaway beds (for an extra
$12 fee each per night to be collected by the Front Desk), 2 Cribs or 1 of each
permitted. Outside there are charcoal grills and picnic table to enjoy. The
cottages do not offer lake views.
Additional, the NGA has requested Ron
Clifton to bring his air mattresses originally procured for the 2007
2010
NGAWire® 22Sep09
The 2010
Possible golf courses include:
Shaker Run Golf Club
Weatherwax Golf Course
Green Crest Gold Club
Beckett Ridge Golf Club
Boone Links Golf Club
Lassing Pointe Golf Club
Planter's Row Golf Links
Golf Club of the
Possible accommodations include:
Manor House at
Comfortable and Spacious House with
Gentle Slope to
Luxury Living in the
The 2010
2009
NGAWire® 21Sep09
The 2009
Bruce Kruckeberg has been added in hope
of his attendance. If you bet on Kruck
and he doesn’t play, too bad for you.
These slips must be turned in prior to
the 1st round. If you feel that you
cannot choose a winner or pick the over/under due to lacking course
information, do not fill out the betting slip.
We are sorry for any incontinence this has caused.
NOTE – I was trying to type
“inconvenience” above, but I liked the word my spell check picked instead.
2009
NGAWire® 21Sep09
If you haven’t purchased your beer and
goodies for
2010
NGAWire® 18Sep09
The NGA is pleased to announce that the 2010
The Golden Triangle is the area formed between the major cities of
With this early announcement, the NGA will be able to secure premium
golf courses and accommodations.
Next year’s event looks to be a first class event.
Sweet
Dream Two
NGAWire® 16Sep09
Steve Lawler – staff writer
Last night I had another TPC dream.
Somehow I was on the phone with Kurncz last night and he put me on hold
to talk with Nagy. I wasn't sure if he did it on purpose but I could hear the
entire conversation like a three-way call.
I heard that Lilac was our first round and there was a change to our
final round and it was going to be at Carrington.
This is when I really thought he knew I was listening because Andy had
ruled out Carrington months ago.
I awoke before Andy switched back over.
2009
TPC | Announcement | Soccer Day is Friday (9/25)
NGAWire® 15Sep09
We are pleased to announce that TPC Soccer Day is set for Friday
(9/25). Please dress in your best soccer
outfit, including jersey, shorts, socks, shoes and jock strap. A soccer ball will be supplied by Steve
Lawler for warm-up purposes prior to the round of golf.
If weather is inclement on Friday, the back-up soccer day is Saturday.
Fast Fact – Did you realize that Trevor Francis only played two seasons
with the Detroit Express (1978-79)? In
33 games with
2009
TPC | Announcement | Elgin Home Visit
NGAWire® 15Sep09
For those of you interested in visiting the home of Jim Elgin, please
plan to arrive to the Riverfront Family Restaurant by
We will be car pooling to view his house from
If you would like to add his address to your GPS, it is as follows:
Jim Elgin, wife Barbara, kids Carl and Courtney
2009
NGAWire® 15Sep09
We are pleased to release our first announcement for the 2009 TPC.
We will be meeting at the Riverfront Family Restaurant in
Riverfront Family Restaurant
(734) 379-3444
If that is too early for you or you are not in need of breakfast, please
note that we will depart the restaurant at
Fun Fact: Rockwood is the home of former NGA member Jim Elgin.
In Da
House
NGAWire® 14Sep09
Below is an e-mail message received from
kruckeberg.rocks.da.house@gmail.com:
My name is Bruce,
And I like to rock,
I am also a golfer,
Sometimes I wear a smock,
Hopefully I will attend the TPC,
Looking forward to seeing Clif and McKay,
I would like to watch many porno,
Maybe even some gay,
I will let you know shortly if I can attend,
Maybe play some good golf too,
God I really, really hope,
Not to step in some doggie poo-poo.
Boy, isn’t it great to hear from
kruckeberg.rocks.da.house@gmail.com?
Sweet
Dream
NGAWire® 14Sep09
Steve Lawler – staff writer
I had a funny nightmare last night.
Bruce couldn't make it to TPC so Karl called Louis. We had 5 guys show up at his house and
climbed into a big Suburban with stadium seating. On the drive (to who knows where) I asked
Karl about Louis handicap, since he had been gone awhile.
Karl said Louis had been practicing his ass off and he was making him a
1.
Then I woke up.
The moral of the story is we need you Bruce!
My Day
At Firestone South Course
NGAWire® 10Sep09
Staff Reporter, Kurt Goetzke
Left work for Akron, OH at about 3:00PM…had to make a stop in Berkley to
pick up a different pair of dress shoes…The old fav Doc Martens finally took a
crap…My boss and I went together in my Commander…we settled in for the long
drive with a trip through the BK Drive Thru (Chicken Sandwich with Cheese)…I
needed a snack before the Dinner we were going to have later…Drive was pretty
uneventful…took about 3 hours and 30 minutes (205 miles)…We pulled into the
Parking Lot of the famed Firestone Golf and Country Club at about 6:30PM and
went straight to the 55th HOLE (the Club Bar) where we were entertained by
FUZZY (the bartender) with stories of glory and BS about the likes of Nick
Price and Greg Norman and Rocco Mediate…The Sambuca and Crown Royal Reserve
were flowing and Dinner was forgotten about until about 9:00PM…we then finally
adjourned to the Dining Area for Steaks, Crab Legs, Soups, Salads, Deserts,
Wine, etc…after our bellies were sufficiently stuffed, we went across to the
Villas to check in and dig into our Case of Miller Lites…on the Balcony, you could
see the Pond surrounding the famed 16th Green…at about Midnight, we hit the
sack anticipating the day ahead…
Woke up at 9:00AM to prepare for the day ahead…Was already giddy with
anticipation of the 1:55PM tee time on the South Course, but, first things
first…BUSINESS…We arrived for our meeting at GOJO at about 10:00AM…got a quick
tour and then into the presentation with the Vice President of Product
development…After that excitement ended, it was back to the course for Lunch
and then up to the Locker Room to prepare…I put on my Shorts and went down to
the Pro Shop to look for a “complimentary shirt”…I found a beauty and then
headed to the hallowed grounds………….and was stopped by the fashion police…It
appears that my nice Docker Shorts were not allowed, since the pockets were “on
the outside” (i.e. Cargo Shorts)…I was told I could purchase a pair for 50% off
and the host said he would pay, but I declined out of spite and went and
slipped on my Wool Long Pants…I then sweated my way through a nice long session
on the range (hit the ball very solid), and then the putting green and practice
bunker…I was READY TO GO!!! I approached
the first tee with great excitement and confidence…I felt GOOD!!! I pegged my 3 iron and smashed it up the left
side, just into the left rough about 130 from the pin…and then began the theme
for the day…don’t miss shots on the wrong sides of the fairways or hole
locations…I drew a decent lie, but a tree loomed about 50 yards ahead…I decided
that I could easily hit over it, so why bother trying to hook the shot and
maybe miss right…big mistake…hit the ball a hair thin and hit the top of the
tree and dropped down left in more trouble…I had to thread the next shot left
of a big tree but right enough to not hit in the greenside bunker…I failed
miserably, clanking if off the big tree, 30 yards back into the fairway, 80
yards from the hole still…from there, I hit a nice spinning SW that came back
too far and left me about 30 feet for BOGEY…not a great start…it got even worse
after leaving the first putt 6 feet short and missing the next for a smooth
TRIPLE…I was crushed…all the anticipation and a TRIPLE…the wind was so far out
of my sales, I wanted to puke…but, I did my best to put it out of my mind and I
stepped up to the reachable Par 5 2nd with renewed vigor (until I shoved my
drive in the bunker, skanked it out to 175, dubbed my 3rd and then missed an 8
footer for Par)…7, 6 start…NICE…The weather got a little nicer the next 4 holes,
as I went 1 under, but it was false hope…was not hitting the ball well at all
and the greens had me baffled…I would short side myself in a bunker and barely
even be able to get it on the green…it lead to 3 more doubles in the next 4-5
holes…I played OK until the famed 16th, where I tried to hook it around the
dogleg and down the hill (it was playing about 600 for us)…I pulled it and it
hit the cart path and went into some place nobody ever hits it…I had to hit
over a telephone pole and wires and then a huge set of trees…somehow, my Rescue
flew true and I got it to 150, where I then proceeded to flush a 9 Iron to 20
feet (and then promptly 3 jerk)…I made a great up and down on 17 and then
bombed my drive to 150 on 18, where another 9 Iron flew true to 15 feet (and
another 3 Putt)…I slumped shoulder walked off the Green, and said my goodbyes
and thank yous and then settled in for a nice 3 and a half hour ride home (in
my driveway at 10:30PM)…See ya Firestone…you were definitely a fine
trek…Nothing really too exciting, just a good, solid golf course with a lot of
history over the hallowed grounds…I wish I would have played better, because
you can definitely score there if you are on your game…
After Note:
The 3 Putt on 18 lead to my boss beating me for the 2nd time in his life
(83-84)…He made a great SS on 18 and also birdied 16 (all with a Bad Back and
beer and painkillers coursing through his body)…he manned up…I was a sorry
excuse for a golfer…
TPC
Training
NGAWire® 22Aug09
Staff Reporter, Dan McKay
So I awoke at
When I arrived there were two guys on the first tee of the West
course. Not good news for me. But I quickly packed up went in and lay down
my cash.
In a couple of minutes I was headed to the tee. As luck would have it the same two guys were
still there. I say luck because they
asked if I wanted to play thru. Awesome
break!
With my shoes still untied I hobbled to the tee. I wacked a tight draw down the middle. It is the longest drive I've hit on that
hole; I only had 55 yards in.
I then hit my new Vokey to 15 and just missed the birdie... Great start.
On the second hole, the tees were all the way left so I pulled out
rescue. I swung and barely buzzed it 50 yards... Right down the middle. Not as much fun I thought.
I hit the ball horribly on the front and was 5 over going to the 9th
tee. It was then that I thought about
the great tee shot I'd hit there a few weeks back and nearly made Eagle. This time I hit a good drive just up the
right fringe of the green. From there I
made a horrible chip, but made the putt.
Turned the front in 39.
I thought if I played this way at TPC... My score would probably be
around 44. I needed to bear down on the
back.
On 10 I hit a drive nowhere and made a good par. On 11 I hit a pop fly flare and made bogey.
On 12 I hit a great drive down the right. Hit a little pull second but still on the
green some 35 from the hole. I got over
the putt and thought lag. I did just
that and came up 15 short. I was pissed
and so the next putt was firm, too firm.
I now had 5 coming back. Guess
what happened? Yep, I did.
Four putt. TPC is getting closer!
When I got to the next tee, I demanded I make up for that shit I just
did.
I hit a great tee shot and hit a beautiful wedge to 7 ft. Drano!
I was happy to bounce back and that was a good lesson for my TPC
warm-up.
I had to wait for a little down pour to pass on the next hole, but I
played decent tee to green coming in.
My first of 10 warm-up rounds was in the books. Though I didn't play well at all, I was happy
with 79.
The itch is now in full force.
Wi-Fi
From 39,000 Feet
NGAWire® 7Jul09
Earlier today the following e-mail conversation occurred:
Chris Lemmon 4:
Dan McKay
Chris Lemmon
Rebuttal
By Holly
NGAWire® 2Jul09
Under heavy criticism from many for her
ill timed phone call to husband Steve, Holly Lawler issued the following
response.
“I do apologize that I messed up a
chance for Steve to shoot a 68. But I do think that one really important detail
was left out of all of this. Yes I did
call. Yes he did hit it in the
drink. But, while he was on the golf
course, our kids and I were out for my birthday dinner. So can I just say that yes, he fully missed
my birthday, but I think he was just a little mad at himself that he made a
wrong decision, therefore hit it right into the drink. So here is some word of advice… DO NOT MISS
YOUR WIFE’S BIRTHDAY!!”
Lawler then added: “Have a safe and happy 4th of July. And
remember one other thing… watch out TPC, Steve is on fire!!”
Lawler
Cashes In (Again)!
NGAWire® 2Jul09
Yesterday NGA Sixty’s Club member and
President Steve Lawler shot 69 at Greystone GC.
Remaining Sixty’s Club members Karl
Nagy and Coree Raden both owe Lawler $20 for his achievement.
Lawler’s round should have been better,
but his wife Holly called while he was playing the 13th hole and
screwed him up.
Lawler noted that “right after she
called I hit it in the drink”.
Nice round nonetheless.
Lemmon’s
Facebook Status Crap
NGAWire® 8Jun09
This past weekend, Chris Lemmon made the following Facebook status
update:
“Shot 73 today and I am unhappy. Go Tiger – win me some money!!!”
What the hell Lem? That is a ridiculous statement.
The NGA officially has put the LGA on probation for stupid comments.
I’ll
Take One Apple Please
NGAWire® 13May09
This past weekend the NGA decided it was finally time to give Bill Gates
a well earned kick to the nuts for his problem plagued Windows operating
system.
The iPod and iPhone will be joined by a 15-inch MacBook Pro.
The MacBook was purchased on Sunday and is expected to arrive by
Wednesday.
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Lemmon
& Partner Drink Themselves To Title
LGAWire® 11May09
Dateline –
Guess who won first place for gross score at the 1-day Jefferson
Lakeside CC member-guest last Friday?
That's right - Lemmon and his guest shot an even par 71 around the
difficult 6,100 yard JLCC track.
The team was 3-over though 5, but birdies on 14, 16 and 17 leapfrogged
them into a thrilling 1st place finish by one stroke over two other teams.
"We didn't see the cart girl until the 6th hole. My partner insisted that we go for the 6-pack
special instead of the single beer approach," Lemmon said. "That was a key strategic move that
ultimately won us the tournament. It was
all decided on the 6th hole."
$30 each in pro shop merchandise was enjoyed by both Lemmon and his
guest.
Golf Lesson
Notes – Part Three
NGAWire® 5May09
For our final lesson
Golf
Lesson Notes – Part Two
NGAWire® 30Apr09
We decided
Golf
Lesson Notes – Part One
NGAWire® 21Apr09
Sandy (Eagle Zone Golf Pro Sandy
Halkett) and I chit-chatted about why I was getting a lesson, past sports
played and the good (hitting the driver) and bad (short game, consistency)
about current golf game. I told her my main focus was to gain more consistent
irons and wedges, my driver was not a huge concern, but that I’ve simply grown
tired of having fun on the course. I hit a 7-iron as
Fairway
Driving Clinic Cancelled
NGAWire® 12Apr09
Yesterday’s much anticipated Kurt Goetzke Fairway Driving Clinic was
cancelled.
After a disappointing Memorial tournament, Goetzke departed the course
immediately upon completing the round.
It is unknown if the clinic will be rescheduled.
The winner of the free 30 minute one-on-one lesson with Goetzke was long
time Glenhust player Jack Mallard.
Upon hearing that his one-on-one lesson would have to be rescheduled,
Mallard stated “I hope we can reschedule it for sometime very soon. I’m not
sure how long I have to live.”
Goetzke
Fairway Driving Clinic Scheduled Tomorrow
NGAWire® 10Apr09
After much ballyhoo, the Kurt Goetzke Fairway Driving Clinic is
scheduled to take place tomorrow.
The clinic will take place during The Memorial golf scramble tournament
at Glenhurst GC in
Goetzke, a self proclaimed golf ball driving machine, recently hit 3 of
14 fairways in a round, including one into a greenside bunker and two near
missies.
As an added bonus, all clinic ticket holders will be entered into a
raffle to receive a 30 minute one-one-one lesson with Goetzke himself. Retail value of the lesson is $100.
NGAWire®
NOTE – Longtime Glenhurst bastion and all around good guy Jack Mallard noted
that if Goetkze was holding a golf clinic after the Memorial, his amateur
status for the Memorial could/should be questioned. It is unsure if the USGA
was contacted.
Google
Group Snippet
NGAWire® 30Mar09
Kurt Goetzke (3:43 PM) – I went to a local BLIMPY’S for lunch today…as I
was getting out of my vehicle, I looked to my left and noticed a familiar
face…It was ¾ HGA…he was parked right in front of a SMOKERS OUTLET shop…I said
howdy and inquired if he was going into the shop, which he affirmed that he
was. It just struck me what a dedicated
Three Stogie Member Dan is…even while he is “working” for Hungry Howie’s, he is
still putting time into his other worthy cause and passion. Way to go Dan…
Dan McKay (
Kurt Goetzke (4:20 PM) – As a novice Cigar aficionado, I very much look
forward to the information you guys will be providing me…I am very interested
in your opinions on “milder” Cigars that do not overpower the pallet and your
senses…I like my Beer not too bitter, my wine not too dry, my Food not too
sweet or spicy…My pallet needs special attention and I know that THREE STOGIES
will provide this for me…
Jeff Longeway (
Kurt Goetzke (
Goetzke
Makes An Ace (Almost)
NGAWire® 28Mar09
Today Kurt Goetzke made an ace (almost).
This was his first ace (almost).
Hooray!!
Goetzke played at Greystone Golf Course with his pals Steve Lawler and
Dan McKay, along with two others.
The magically shot (almost) occurred on the 12th hole (the
third of the day). The hole played around 177 yards, the pin was in front.
The weather was a bit nippy, so Goetzke choose a 7-iron. He hit a majestic shot that started off at
the left edge of the green and cut back toward the pin. It looked beautiful from the onset.
The ball landed on the front of the green and rolled straight toward the
cup. Bingo! Goetzke finally made an ace
(almost)!
Congrats pal! Welcome to the club
(almost)!
Who’s
Your Daddy?
NGAWire® 25Mar09
Who’s your daddy? Anna is! Australian golfer and female minx Anna Rawson
became the fourth Go Daddy Girl on Wednesday.
She joins IndyCar driver Danica Patrick, professional poker player
Vanessa Rousso and professional model Candice Michelle as a Go Daddy
spokesperson.
Rawson, who is a model when she's not teeing up on the LPGA, should fit
right in. Back in February, in an attempt to promote the LPGA, Rawson told a
radio station in Adelaide, Australia, ""They still think we're at 25
years ago when the tour was full of, you know, a lot of dykes and unattractive
females nobody wanted to watch.''
She later apologized, stating that she wasn't really giving her opinion,
but was only commenting on her observances of others' perceptions.
Rawson somewhat enjoys making controversial statements. According to the
Daily Telegraph (an Australian men's magazine), she has "penis envy."
She went on to say that she could never be with a woman because she was
"just fascinated by what men can do with their bodies that we can't."
Aren’t we all Anna, aren’t we all.
Sunny
Sunday
NGAWire® 23Mar09
Dan McKay, staff writer
After doing some spring yard cleanup, a trip to Lowe’s and enjoying the
tourney/golf action, I took a little time to enjoy my Hemingway Classic.
Upon lighting it, the deep spices were pleasant to the palette. The smoke provided hints of coffee and was
easy to draw. The burn was even and the ash reached two inches, even in a
gentle breeze. At times memories of the Opus X crept in, but didn't last.
All in all, a great cigar for a late afternoon Sunday smoke. The Beagles
also agree.
McKurncz rating of four stogies (out of five).
NGAWire®
NOTE – Maybe a NGA sponsored cigar review web site would be good idea?
A
Night With Marist
NGAWire® 22Mar09
Below is a recap of last night’s e-mail activity between Karl Nagy, Dan
McKay and Andy Kurncz while watching the opening round NCAA Women’s basketball
game between the Marist College Red Foxes and the
KN
DM
KN 9:
KN 3:45am: Hello! Anyone?
KN 3:41am: Hi Dan! Are you up?
KN 12:47am: I love JV. Too bad this was her last game. Nice timing.
DM
KN 12:40am: Julianne's face says it all. Night night.
DM
KN 12:35am: Maybe!
DM
DM
KN 12:30am: ...and you are from a country known worldwide for hookers
and pot.
KN 12:28am:
Hooray!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DM
KN 12:26am: I still don't know how that guy got away with murder? They
coked up poor Nat a bit too much.
DM
KN 12:24am:
Gonzaga is full of bull dikes.
KN 12:22am: Maybe they will go back? I hope.
DM
KN 12:20am: Bullshit.
DM
KN 12:20am: What the hell ESPN2. I want Marist!
DM
DM
KN 12:16am: I'm back. Lobo texted like a horse. I couldn't understand
her. Marist down by 15. Come on!!!
KN 12:14am: Rebecca Lobo on twitter... I'll be back.
DM
DM
KN 12:11am: Great Bud Light commercial.
KN 12:
DM
KN 12:06am: 31 or 33??
KN
DM
DM
KN 12:
DM
KN
DM
At least it won't take long to clear.
KN
KN
AK
DM
KN
DM
KN
KN
DM
AK
KN
KN
AK
KN
DM
DM
AK
DM
KN
KN
DM
KN
DM
KN 11:
KN 11:
DM
KN
KN
KN
KN:
KN 10;53pm: My bad. Wrong first impression. Somewhat cute.
DM
KN
KN
KN
DM
KN
DM
KN
KN
DM
KN
DM
BMW
Manufacturing Saves Verizon Heritage
NGAWire® 17Mar09
The car dilemma for next month's Verizon Heritage (in
With General Motors recently withdrawing their traditional car support
for the 41st annual PGA TOUR event at the Harbour Town Golf Links, Tournament
Director Steve Wilmot had to work fast to land a new car commitment.
"We thank BMW for stepping up and solving our courtesy car
problem," said Wilmot. "BMW
recognized the importance of the Verizon Heritage to the state of
Hundreds of Verizon Heritage volunteers have agreed to lend a hand by
driving the vehicles from the BMW Factory in Greer to The Sea Pines
Resort. The first 50 cars are scheduled
for pick up on Wednesday, March 18th.
NGAWire®
Note – We hope and pray that
2009
TPC Location Revealed
NGAWire® 16Mar09
The location of the 2009 TPC, set to be played
Possible cities included inside “the box” are
Good luck to all prospective locations!
My
Good Saturday
NGAWire® 14Mar09
Dan McKay, staff writer
On Saturday Kim was out early that morning at a Mom-to-Mom sale, Dylan
and I watched TGC to catch up on things.
It was then that I decided it would be a good day to get the Memorial
application in.
After Kim got back, I took a shower and was ready to go.
I made my way over Glenhurst to sign up for the Memorial. On the way there I stopped at Sams Club to
pick up some new floor mats for the Outlook. While at Sams I stopped at the
food court and bought a giant frozen Coke for $.88. It was great.
When I finally got to Glenhurst, I checked out the 18th green and it was
surprisingly in pretty good shape. I
then headed over to the clubhouse.
After a 10 minute wait behind two guys debating Top-Flite and Pinnacles,
I could no longer hold my bladder and decided to make my way to the
toilet. Then after quite an enjoyable urination session I washed
up and headed back to the counter and then waited another ten minutes behind a
lady and two other regulars who talked about the longest coldest winter we’ve
ever had.
When I finally get my turn, I find out that the applications for the
Memorial were sitting on the counter to the right of me. Oh the joy.
As I sit down to complete the app, I remember that I have a Montecristo
in the car. What a perfect way to fill
it out, I thought.
After lighting up the MC and looking at the app I had a question for
Steve so I gave him a call. We spoke for
a couple of minutes, laughed about something, and then I hung up and completed
the app. I filled out the check and
handed both in. I was then informed that
we were team 4.
After enjoying the MC, taking some pics (of which I sent to the group),
and enjoying the sites of springtime golf in
When I got home, I had some leftover ribs and coleslaw from the night
before and then took a little nap with Dylan on the couch. When I woke up I
changed clothes and met up with some high schools friends for a night at the
track, Northville downs.
The track conditions were fast and so was the betting. After winning a solid return in the first
race, we proceeded to hit a 7 race slump.
But, during that time I quite enjoyed a few draft Bud Lights and the
whole roasted peanuts for $2.50, quite a bargain.
In the 9th race we won a nice Trifecta bet. This success led us to bet the load for the
next race. Unfortunately we missed out
on the Superfecta by one horse.
Taking our losses in stride we left the track to partake in an old
Madison high school tradition of Telways (if you’ve never been there, it is an
absolute must). I ordered four with
everything and was greeted with the same heavenly taste I’ve known since my
youth. They all quickly made their way
down my gullet, and I was headed home.
When I got home, I was greeted by the full fledged HOWL of the beagles
(my ears are still ringing). I made my
way into the family room and kicked back to watch some TV. There was some special about the Bermuda
Triangle on and it locked me into its grasp.
My belly was then wondering if we had anything sweet in the house to sum
up the day. Upon further inspection I
found some Edy’s Girl Scout Samoas ice cream in the freezer. Two scoops later I was on the couch learning
more about oceanic fog, dozing off and reflecting upon a good day.
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2009
CJI Top Tens
NGAWire® 12Mar09
Dan McKay
10. Boston’s Best Breakfast…. Beans
with breakfast, what a concept.
9. Porn on the X5 entertainment system.
8. Getting dubbed the “Everything Bagel”…………….still pretty funny.
7. Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha from Starbucks… thanks NGA!
6. Seeing Lemmon’s face when the Bombay Sapphire shattered into a
trillion pieces….. he almost made the kick save
5. The birth of the McKurncz and the new betting system .
4. Watching the NGA eat a half a bottle of habanero sauce and the tears
and sweat that followed.
3. Margaritaville Nachos and then some and then some.
2. OPUS X……….the company, the taste, the smooth smoke, the buzz.
1. TMC SAM.
Steve Lawler
1. Bageling team Burrito on day two forcing them to concede.
2. Nagy from the elevator to the 14th racing Chappy from the 12th floor.
3. Pretzer and Goetzke walking over to sit down to eat at the winners
table at Margaritaville and Nagy saying “The losers are over there”.
4. McKay on hole #10 of last round from 100 yards…addresses the ball,
backs off, addresses again and then fats it about 5 yards and says “I should
have backed off again.”
5. Kurncz on hole #17 of last round tees up two way right and declares
“I am gonna hook this one” It goes even
farther right over the houses.
6. Porn on the BMW dvd player.
7. Eating lunch the first day and watching three chicks back into a stop
sign.
8. Eating breakfast on Saturday morning with some noisy toddlers near
and Goetzke commented “I have an idea kid, how about shut the hell up!”
9. Playing the last 84 yard par three team challenge scramble with a
putter off the tee to 20 feet and Pretzer wedge putted into the hole to make
another insulting birdie for -8 to win by three.
10. Winning the McChurncz and the CGI all in one weekend.
Ron Clifton
10. having a bed not a pull out couch.
9. not getting crushed at cash hold em.
8. wild wing comp 18 plus goods.
7. sea glass value.
6. birdie on 9 prestwick skin.
5. near hole in one 6 prestwick made birdie putt cut Lemmon.
4. splitting hold em pot with coree wednesday hold em 60 40.
3. splitting hold em pot 40 60 sat with kurt.
2. me and pretzer beating coree and kurt 2 games to 1 in darts.
1. carrying team grimace at prestwick.
Andy Kurncz
10. Sticky Fingers, date night extravaganza.
9. Craftmatic adjustable bed.
8. 15 hour drive down, and back.
7. Lemmon saying “no mas” to Chappy.
6. NGA hot sauce incident.
5. NGA chasing Chappy to room.
Stairs vs. Elevator. “You tricked
me you bastard”….Nagy as laughing whilst face red as a beet.
4. Margaritaville Nachos, and Margaritaville Nachos, and Margaritaville
Nachos.
3. Clifton teaching Pretzer the finer points of Match Play.
2. Birth of “Team Bagel”.
Salt-Everything-Poppyseed-Sun Dried Tomato-Plain, and subsequent birth
of McKurncz. Should be an annual
event.
1. Opus X…What a buzz…Wow…Who would have thought the front lobby of a
laundry room would be the “perfect” place to enjoy one of these babies. Thanks again ½ HGA.
Items that just missed the cut
* Clifton making me his bitch with 9-10, and A-2 in hold-em.
* Hitting 4th ball off tee at 17th Saturday. Lawler tells me to change my vector. I say, No, I can hit this shot, I know
it. Give me another ball Dan.
* Clifton getting beat by 12 year old who took up the game 7 months ago.
* Wild Wing service…It should be a must play every year…may turn into
the home of the McKurncz.
* Talking with a drunken Goetzke on phone when we arrived in
MB….Buddy…BUDDY…YOU NEED TO TALK TO THE LOBBY LADY.
Chris Lemmon
10. Checking Yahoo! Mail in the morning to see what you guys did the night
before.
9. Playing 5,700 yd courses.
8. Getting sick and almost barfing after Margaretville.
7. Running out of the elevator after Kurt says "watch out!"
and almost hurls on Sunday morning.
6. Thinking I won the poker tourney when Pretzer was still playing. Oops.
5. Worst meal in a year at Pier 14.
Although shots were great - thanks!
4. Overshooting the green and losing my ball at the par 3…beginning of
the end.
3. Getting pencil whipped by Chappy every round.
2. Breaking bottles of Gin on the kitchen floor.
1. Finishing up in the dusk every day on the golf course - just like
Tiger.
Kurt Goetzke
10. PIER 14 Dinner (last meal until Tuesday Night).
9. Waking up at 3:00AM not feeling too hot.
8. The first Ass Pissing session a bit later.
7. Not being able to play golf Sunday AM.
6. Asking the Front Desk if they had another room to stay in after check
out and finding out they didn’t.
5. The next 10 Ass Pissing Sessions before check out.
4. Packing all my stuff and hauling it into a cab and going to Dayton
House (and having to pay $53 additional).
3. Not being able to sleep because I had 20 more Ass Pissing sessions
over the next few hours.
2. Ride to Airport with Fever and Chills.
1. Arriving home at Midnight and not being able to sleep all night and
then having to get up and go to work the next morning and then right back on a
plane to Vegas that night.
Karl Nagy
10. The cannon of an arm by the cart boy at Palmetto Greens.
9. Enjoying Boston’s Best Breakfast – damn, baked beans are really good
for breakfast!
8. Clifton carrying our team during the front nine at Prestwick with
birdies on 5 and 9.
7. Our gesture of good will during the final hole of the par 3.
6. TMC – What a great place!
5. The nachos gorge fest at Margaretville.
4. Watching Lemmon walk to the gas station for beer while his teammates
struggled on during the par 3.
3. Naming of Team Bagel – Everything McKay, Plain Clifton, Salt Goetzke,
Poppy Lemmon and Sun Dried Tomato Raden.
2. TMC – What a great place! Wait, didn’t I already say that?
1. Winning the 2009 CJI in a landside.
2009
CJI Course Rota Finalized
NGAWire® 3Mar09
The format and courses for the 2009 CJI are finally finalized.
The course schedule is:
Round 1 – 3/5/09 – Indigo Creek, 1:59, 2:07, 2:15, White tees
(6167 yards, 70.2/130)
Round 2 – 3/6/09 – Palmetto Greens, 12:00, 12:08, 12:16, Gold tees
(6769 yards, 71.8/124)
Round 3 – 3/7/09 – River Oaks Plantation, 12:30, 12:37, 12:45,
White tees (6425 yards, 70.6/126)
The two teams are Montecristo Afrique
and Poblano Pesto Chicken Burrito. The
players and their handicaps are:
Montecristo Afrique
Steve Lawler 0, Karl Nagy (CAPT) 3, Jeff Pretzer 5, Andy Kurncz 7,
Mark Chapman 10
Poblano Pesto Chicken Burrito
Chris Lemmon 0, Kurt Goetzke 3, Coree Raden 5, Dan McKay (CAPT) 7,
Ron Clifton 10
The format for each round of play is match play as follows:
Round 1 – 2‐Man Teams Total Score (Match Play) for Front, Back, and Totals (3
points)
Round 2 – 2‐Man Teams Best Ball (Match Play) for Front, Back, and Totals (3
points)
Round 3 - Singles
Matches – The matches are Match Play events for Front, Back, and Totals (3
points)
There are a total of 33 total points available. The first team to
each 17 points will be declared the 2009 CJI champion.
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